Dancing Series
by CrazyBuff
Summary: Buffy and Spike have an unexpected experience at the Bronze...
1. I Want You To Need Me

I Want You To Need Me  
SUMMARY: Buffy and the scooby gang go to the bronze for an outing. Spike shows up and one dance is all it takes to start something.  
DISCLAIMER: okay okay, you know the drill, Joss Whedon owns the show and characters... the only thing I own is the plot.  
RATING: PG (barely any swearing)  
SPOILERS: Nothing after Blood Ties is ruined for you. There isn't much in here that is from the show, but yuo'd have to know the basics of the 5th season.   
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Post Blood Ties. Spike/Buffy. Lyrics from Celine Dion's All The Way cd.  
  
  
Buffy practically skipped into the Magic Shop that day. She had aced the majorly huge, incredibly difficult exam that she had studied hours for, and also Dawn seemed to be dealing better.   
She smiled affectionately when she saw Giles pretending to not hear the sex argument Anya and Xander were in engaged in. He was not pretending well. She could see the slightly traumatized look on his face. She then looked over to Willow and Tara who weren't even going to the trouble of pretending to ignore the couple. They looked slightly fascinated by the strange dispute between the lovers. "Hey guys!" she chirped. Everyone, save Xander and Anya turned towards her.  
"Hey Buffy!" Willow replied, smiling her sweet, adorable little smile.  
"Why, hello Buffy." Giles said. "I take it things are, well, better?"  
"Of the good" Buffy answered.  
"Where's Dawn?" Tara asked.  
"Oh, her and mom are having some quality time today."  
"That's good" Willow piped up. "Is she doing all right?"  
"She's dealing very well."  
"Anya, please, can not talk about this here?" Xander's voice rose up, catching everyone's interest.  
"But we need to talk!" Anya protested.  
"But not here. We can talk later, honey. You know, when we're alone?" Anya simply stared at him. "Please?"  
"Fine" Anya gave in, rolling her eyes.  
"Thank you" Xander turned his attention back to the others. "Hey Buff, when did you get here?"  
"Just a couple minutes ago"  
"Oh, didn't see you come in" Buffy's response was to smile knowingly at him.  
After a moment of silence Buffy spoke up. "So, um, since things have been slow lately in the slaying department, not counting the bitch from hell, who I'm guessing won't try to mess with the powerful witch duo for a while," She smiled at Willow and Tara. "Maybe we could have a little fun tonight."  
"Sounds good to me." Willow chimed in. "Unless anyone has objections..?"  
"Not a one" Xander countered.  
"This is probably going to be the only time we're going to be able to do non-demony stuff for a while though." Buffy said a slight sadness to her voice.  
"Right, I hear ya, I'll be sure to bring my boogie shoes tonight." Xander assured.  
"And Giles can even come if he wants" Buffy offered.  
  
******  
  
Buffy watched the two couples dancing to a slow song. Normally she would have been slightly depressed since she didn't have a honey at the time, but she was in too good of mood to let that get to her. She would have kind of liked to have someone to talk to, but Giles had wormed his way out of going. She smiled as thought back to earlier that day when she had told Giles he could come. He had looked like a deer in headlights, and after much babbling, he finally came up with a justification to why he could not join them.  
She focused her thoughts back to her friends on the dance floor. *They look so happy* she thought with a sigh. *Like I used to be* She watched her friends sway to the music. She wasn't envious of them, far from, she was very pleased that they had all found each other. It wasn't like she was all gloomy and miserable either, she had her wonderful friends, she didn't need to have a man to be happy. *It would be nice though.*  
"Hello, Slayer" A voice said, breaking her from her thoughts. She looked up, and rolled her eyes, sighing.  
Spike.  
"What are you doing here, Spike?" she asked.  
"Same thing as you I imagine" He replied. "Having a little fun after a hard fight. Not to mention to escaping from the tremendous monotony of hanging around my crypt all the time."  
*Ooooh big words for Spike* She thought to herself  
"Okay, then why don't you go and pester someone else" She said, even though she didn't want him to leave. He was fun to banter with, with all his cockiness and little nicknames he came up with for her. And they had formed somewhat of a friendship, though she wouldn't admit that to him. She wouldn't tell him that she enjoyed having him around.   
"Cuz' irritating you is my much loved hobby" he said sitting in the chair across from her, apparently trying to piss her off. It wasn't working. It was egging her on to fight with him.  
"Excuse me, who said you could sit there?"   
"I did."  
"Since when did anything you say count for anything?" Buffy baited, trying to look stern and annoyed. It wasn't working too well. Spike could tell she was enjoying the playful fight as much as he was. "So go away" she added when he didn't budge.  
"And since when did I ever listen to anything you say?"  
"Since you stopped being big bad and started helping me" she replied smiling sweetly at him.  
"Piss off"  
"This is my table"   
"So?"  
"So you can 'Piss off '" She said, imitating his accent. She attempted again to be irritated, but it only ended up with her laughing.  
"What's so amusing Slayer?"  
"You're so.... stupid. And shutup, I ran out of names."  
  
*****  
  
The slow song had ended, and Xander, Anya, Willow, and Tara went back to the table.  
"Hey, what is Spike doing at our table?" Xander said indicating the blond vampire.  
"Xander, be nice, he's our friend" Anya said.  
"Since when?" Xander inquired.  
"Well, him and Buffy are talking aren't they?" Anya pointed out. The others approached the table. They WERE talking, and LAUGHING! Xander almost pissed his pants.   
"What's going on?!? Why is HE sitting here?" Xander practically shouted. He got a startled, yet thoughtful look on his face before he turned to Willow. "Did you do another spell to brainwash them?"  
"No!" Willow said defending herself.  
"Xander, relax. What's the problem?" Buffy said looking up at Xander.  
"The problem is Evil Dead sitting at our table"  
"Oh, this bleached moron, don't mind him" Buffy said, not being able to resist goading Spike again.  
"And you're one to talk." Spike reached over and showed Buffy a strand of her own hair. "This isn't natural either, luv" He settled back into his chair. He watched as Buffy did a very un-slayer like thing. She stuck her tongue out at him. He chuckled in response.  
Her friends stared at Buffy with shock as they watched her teasingly throw an abandoned peanut at Spike. Buffy giggled when he growled.   
"Will, do something about this" Xander griped in Willow's ear.  
"Okay" she answered. "I have to go to the bathroom. Buffy come with me."   
"K" Buffy got up and took the direction where she would have to pass behind Spike. She reached out and tousled his hair as she walked past.  
"Bloody hell woman... "   
  
*****  
  
As soon as Buffy closed the bathroom door Willow pounced on her.  
"What were you doing out there?" she demanded.  
"What do you mean?"  
"You and Spike talking, without you kicking his ass!"  
"Maybe I like being around him" Buffy said finally confessing that one thing her friends totally didn't know about her.  
"Since when?!?"  
"You know, this is why I was never ever going to tell you guys that"  
"What kind of feelings are you having for him?" Willow asked wearily.  
"Will, he's fun to fight with, especially play fight with. He puts up with my shit and throws it right back at me, that's all"  
"I don't know, you were acting kind of flirty. Him too, but mostly you"   
"Will, there's absolutely nothing between us in that way" Buffy lied. She was unquestionably attracted to the blonde vampire. She would NEVER admit to that, not to anyone.   
"Okay, just checking. Xander would have a heart attack." She declared with a slight laugh.  
"I'm sure he still will when he finds out that I think of Spike in even a friendly way."  
"Most likely"   
"What do you think he'd do if I sat on Spike's lap?" Buffy wondered.  
"Buffy!" Willow shrieked, gawking at her friend.  
"Just kidding, Will"  
  
******  
  
When Buffy and Willow returned to the table, Anya and Spike were talking and Xander was making conversation with Tara, trying to ignore the vampire.  
"Xander, aren't you going to talk to Spike?" Anya queried.  
"I don't talk to blonde, English, annoying vampires, sorry"  
Buffy and Willow sat down in their respective seats.   
"I take it we're not getting along?" Buffy said, amused.  
"Well no. Until all persons without a heartbeat GO AWAY, I'm pretty upset." Xander glowered, obviously getting quickly annoyed by the vampire.  
"What happened to your boogie shoe philosophy?" Buffy questioned.  
"You know, dancing is a good idea. Whose with me?" Willow, Tara, and Anya stood. "Okay ladies, ready to do some heavy duty dancing with Xand-man?" They all smiled at him. "What, the Buffster not in for some boogieing?" He said when he saw she wasn't standing.  
"Nah, maybe later. I'll just talk to Spike." She held back a giggle as smoke practically came out of Xander's ears before he turned and stomped towards the dance floor, the girls in tow.  
"I don't think he likes me very much, pet. I think you're the only one who hates me more than him."  
"I... I don't hate you" Spike glanced at her. She was looking down at her lap, avoiding his gaze. She could feel his eyes burning into her. She slowly raised her head. "I mean, You've been around for a while now, and I guess what I'm trying to say is that we've become friends." She stared at him, pleading him with her eyes to tell her that he felt the same way.  
"I guess we have" Buffy let out the breath she hadn't even realized she'd been holding and smiled shyly at him.  
"So, uh, now that you're part of the gang, would you like to be my patrol buddy?" She asked, trying to jump away from the topic.  
"Count me in"  
  
  
******  
  
Spike and Buffy had been sitting in silence for a few minutes, when a slow song came on. Buffy watched all the couples join and hold each other close as they swayed to the music.   
Spike was also watching the couples on the dance floor. *If only the Slayer would let me hold her like that* . He would give anything for just one dance with her. He started trying to envision what it would be like to hold the petite, exquisite slayer close to him, when her voice brought him out of his fantasy.  
"You know what, I haven't danced at all tonight. And that's something I don't get to do often"  
"Oh, go ahead"  
"Actually, I was going to ask you if you wanted to, well, you know dance " Buffy said hurriedly, getting it over with. Her palms began getting sweaty when he looked up at her. She couldn't believe she had asked him to dance with her, but she really, really wanted to. Just the thought of his body pressed up against hers made her tremble with anticipation.  
"Alright" Spike managed. She had asked him to dance. He was shocked, suprised, excited, estatic, scared, panicked, and completely blissful all at once. He stood and let her guide him out to the dance floor.  
  
"I wanna be the face to see when you close your eyes  
I wanna be the touch you need every single night  
I wanna be your fantasy  
And be your reality  
And everything between"  
  
Buffy wrapped her arms around Spike's neck as his hands found their way around her waist. Buffy looked him straight in the eye as they swayed to the music that seemed to depict exactly how they felt.  
  
"I want you to need me  
Like the air that you breathe  
I want you to feel me  
In everything  
I want you to see me   
In your every dream  
The way that I taste you, feel you, breathe you, need you  
I want you to need me, need me  
Like I need you"  
  
The music coursed through them as they got lost in each other's eyes, both searching for the same thing the other felt, yet not allowing their own feelings to be revealed , not wanting to be rejected.  
  
"I wanna be the eyes that look deep into your soul  
I wanna be the world to you I just want it all  
I wanna be your deepest kiss  
The answer to your every wish   
And all you ever need"  
  
Willow looked around the room and did a double take when she saw Spike and Buffy dancing close, too close for it to be just friendly, and gazing into each other's eyes, completely unconscious to the other people around them. *Sure Buffy, absolutely no attraction there*   
  
"I want you to need me  
Like the air you breathe  
I want you to feel me  
In everything  
I want you to see me  
In your every dream  
The way that I taste you, feel you, breathe you, need you  
I want you to need me, need me"  
  
The second Xander saw Buffy dancing way, way too close to Spike, his first impulse was to charge over there and pull them apart. He couldn't though. He noticed the way they were staring at each other. They looked like they were thisclose to tearing each others clothing off *Its nauseating...*  
  
"'Coz I need you more than you could know  
And I need you to never never let me go  
And I need to be deep inside your heart  
I just want to be everywhere you are"  
  
Buffy kept looking Spike in the eye, hoping against hope to find that he was attracted to her, yearning for her like she desired him. The words to the song explained exactly what she experienced at the moment, and it was really getting to her. *This is going to change things* she thought. But, she didn't mind, it was so perfect, their bodies seemed to mold together, like they were created for each other.  
  
"I wanna be the face you see when you close your eyes  
I wanna be the touch you need every single night  
I wanna be your fantasy  
And be your reality  
And everything between.."  
  
Spike wouldn't care if someone killed him right than and there, he would die happy. Buffy was letting him hold her close like he always had wanted to. Did she know how much he cherished her? She couldn't possibly, she most likely thought of the dance as merely friendly. He couldn't really decipher what she thought of it, her eyes were revealing nothing. But he stubbornly kept his gaze, trying to uncover something, anything.   
  
"I want you to need me  
Like the air you breathe  
I want you to feel me  
In everything  
I want you to see me  
In your every dream  
'Coz baby I taste you, feel you, breathe you, need you  
I want you to need me, need me  
Like I need you"  
  
The song ended and the blonde couple unwillingly pulled away from each other, not sure what do next. They stood there for an instant, avoiding each other's eyes, before deciding to make for their table. They both sat in their seats. Buffy folded her arms across her stomach, the silence making her uncomfortable.  
"Hey, anybody want a drink?" the two looked up at the sound of Xander's voice.  
"Um, actually, I'm going to go patrol" Buffy said, not wanting to handle what had just transpired. She knew that there was no way the others hadn't seen her dancing with Spike.  
"I thought you were free of obligations tonight"   
"It's in my blood" Buffy said simply.  
"Do you want me to come with you?" She glanced over at Spike. She was getting tense around him, fast. "Uh, no, I, uh, just want to go alone tonight" He nodded and looked away. She said goodbye to the others and preceded to leave, sighing.  
  
*****  
  
Willow was fully aware what was going on between the Slayer and the blonde vampire. She scurried after Buffy, catching up with her. She gently seized her arm.  
"Buffy, what's really going on with Spike? I saw you two dancing"  
"We're just friends, Will, I told you already. It was just a dance."  
Willow nodded and watched the Slayer leave the club. She knew her friend was lying. Willow didn't get why they didn't grasp the idea that they felt the same way about each other, even from dancing they way the had. She shrugged and headed back to the table.  
  
~End  
  
  
Stories in series ~   
  
[I Want You To Need Me] [My All] [Fall For You] 


	2. My All

My All  
SUMMARY: Buffy finds that she is attracted to Spike... very much so. How long will they be able to keep their hands off each other?  
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of its characters. I only own the storyline.  
RATING: PG13 ( swearing and sexual references)  
SPOILAGE: All events from 5th season up until "Blood Ties" applies. Stuff from the first fic of the series, I Want You To Need Me, is talked about in here. So, you might want to read it first (link at the bottom of the page)  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Spike/Buffy. Lyrics from Mariah Carey's Butterfly cd.  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It had been two days. Two horrible, long days since she had last seen Spike. All she could think about was how good it felt for him to hold her. She just had to go and ask him to dance that night at the Bronze. She had really screwed everything up. She wanted to be able to just go and see him agian, be able to tease with him and act like nothing had happened. *That's it* she realized. Act like nothing had happened. Act like she didn't want him. Act like their dance had been nothing but a sign of their new friendship. *I'm going to have to be a pretty damn good actor*   
  
*****  
  
Spike had not moved from his position since that night. Since the night when he held the Slayer close in his arms, moving to the rythem of the music. He could remember every little detail; the way she smelled, the way her warmth engulfed him making him never wanting to let go, the way her hazel eyes had stared deep into his, the way their bodies had fit together, and the way the rest of the world seemed to fade away. He sighed pulling his blanket higher on his chest. He really wasn't going to get any sleep.  
  
*****  
  
Buffy knocked on the door to Spike's crypt, determined to at least not give up the friendship they had.   
"One minute" she heard from inside.  
Her heart thudded in her chest. She wasn't so sure anymore. She wasn't sure she could act normal around him. Not when the sound of his voice alone made her knees go weak. *Get a grip on yourself, Buffy* she thought mentally slapping herself.   
Once Buffy had calmed down, Spike opened the door. She stepped inside, allowing him to close the door, so he wouldn't get a dangerous sunburn. She was very close to just forgetting everything she had resolved about how to act around him and just fling her arms around him and kiss him until he forgot his own name.  
"Hey, whats up?" Spike said, struggling to control his emotions. Here she was, standing there looking completly beautiful, while he was just trying to figure out how he was going to keep himself from grabbing her and telling her how much he loved her.  
" I vaguely remember you saying that you'd be my slaying partner. Unless you've changed your mind?" She said, looking everywhere but him, knowing she'd lose the battle with herself if she looked into his ice blue eyes.  
" No, I havn't" She was making it pretty obvisious that the dance they had shared had meant nothing to her. He avoided her beautiful hazel eyes, afraid she would learn the truth if she stared into his eyes like she had a couple of nights ago.  
"Oh, good. Well, um, do you want to meet me in front of my house around 9:00ish?"  
"I'm free" He said trying to sound carefree.   
They stood a few moments like that until Buffy broke the silence.  
"Spike?" His name slipped out of her lips before she could think. She wanted to ask him what the dance had meant to him. But there was no way she could. She was pretty sure she already knew the answer.  
"Yeah?" He replied, barely hanging onto his sensibilty. The sound of his name from her was making it even harder for him. His mind slowly slipped back into the memories of dancing with her.  
  
"I am thinking of you  
In my sleepless solitude tonight  
If its wrong to love you  
Than my heart just won't let me be right  
'Cause I've drowned in you  
And I won't pull through  
Without you by my side"  
  
"Nothing, nevermind" She said quickly, losing her will to stay calm as he stepped closer to her.  
"Is something wrong, Slayer?" He wouldn't dare say her name. He was having enough trouble keeping himself from surrendering into his desires.  
*Yes!* Buffy wanted to scream *I want you!* But she couldn't; it would hurt too much to have that kind of rejection from him.  
  
"I'd give my all to have  
Just one more night with you  
I'd risk my life to feel  
Your body next to mine  
'Cause I can't go on  
Living in the memory of our song  
I'd give my all for your love tonight"  
  
Instead she said, "No, I'm just kind of spacey. I didn't get much sleep last night" That was defently true. She hadn't been able to get any sleep since that night at the Bronze.   
"Do you want me to take over patrol by myself so you can get some sleep?"   
"No I'm good" Buffy said without thinking. For some crazy reason she wanted to be around him as much as possible, even though she could barely control herself around him.  
"Are you sure?" He said, taking a step closer to her. That left him only a few inches away from her and he was going crazy. His body had moved closer on its own accord, and his mind was screaming at him to touch her.  
Buffy freaked the second he stepped closer to her. Her every instinct was shouting for her to touch him. She so had to stop this. "Yeah, I have to go, see you later" She said, before practically bolting from the crypt.   
  
"Baby can you feel me  
Imagining I'm looking in your eyes  
I can see you clearly  
Vividly emblazoned in my mind  
And yet you're so far  
Like a distant star  
I'm wishing on tonight"   
  
*****  
  
Buffy ran to the nearest tree and leaned agianst it, panting. The arousal she had felt from being so close to him was startling. Sure, she had been aroused when they had danced, but this time he hadn't even touched her and she was already panting like a bitch in heat. *Damn* she thought. *Maybe this plan isn't going to work*  
  
*****  
  
"I'd give my all to have  
Just one more night with you  
I'd risk my life to feel  
Your body next to mine  
'Cause I can't go on  
Living in the memory of our song  
I'd give my all for your love tonight"  
  
Spike really had no idea what had gotten over him. He shouldn't have gotten that close to her. If he hadn't gone and done that, the bulge that was uncomfortably rubbing agianst his jeans wouldn't be there. He hadn't even touched her either. Unlife was just unfair.   
  
"I'd give my all to have  
Just one more night with you  
I'd risk my life to feel  
Your body next to mine  
'Cause I can't go on  
Living in the memory of our song  
I'd give my all for your love tonight  
Give my all for your love  
Tonight"  
  
*****  
  
By the time Buffy had arrived at the magic shop, she was horny as hell. She just had to have naughty thoughts about Spike on the way there. She took a much needed deep breathe and opened the door and walked over to the table where Willow, Tara, Anya, and Xander were sitting.   
"Hey Buff, what did Deadboy Junior say?"  
"Its a go" She said, her mind not all there. She was mentally fighting naughty Spike sex thoughts.  
Willow took in her best friend's apperance. She could tell she was thinking intently about something, she was breathing heavy, and her cheeks were flushed. "Hey, Buffy, can I talk to you in the training room?"  
"Sure"  
  
******  
  
"Okay, Buffy, tell me what's going on. Don't lie to me either. I know something is up"   
"Oh God, Will, I'm having a big problem"  
"Do you want to talk about it?"  
"I want Spike! I can't stop thinking about him, and its all my fault becuase I asked him to dance, and now I can't stop thinking about it!"   
"Buffy, you wanting Spike is not a bad thing."  
"No, but he only thinks of me as a friend"  
"You know, you could be wrong, unless you talked to him?"   
"No, I didn't but I'm pretty sure."  
"You should talk to him"  
"I'll try. Tonight when we patrol. First I have to go home and take a very cold shower."  
Willow held back a giggle. "What exactly happened between you two that made you, well you know.."  
"Its all his fault! He got too close to me when we were talking, made me want to touch and kiss him, and then all because of all that I had wrong thoughts on the way here!"  
Willow couldn't help but laugh this time.   
"Wills!" Buffy whined.  
"Sorry. Its just, if you really want him that much, just kind of go with your instincts"  
"Are you kidding?!? If I go with my instincts, he'll end up sans clothing within seconds!"  
"Okay, maybe not a good idea" Willow said, still amused by how Buffy was talking. "And I think you need to go take that cold shower"  
"Right" Buffy started to leave.  
"Buffy, what do you want me to tell the others about why you're leaving so soon?"  
"Tell them the truth, I don't care.. As long as none of it gets back to Spike"  
"Tell them that you..?" Willow gave her a look.  
"I don't care. It doesn't really matter does it?"  
"Okay, well you go ahead and I'll explain your problem to the others" Willow said, trying to keep a straight face.   
"See you later, Will"  
"Bye, Buffy"  
  
*****  
  
Willow sat back down in her chair after Buffy left.   
"Where's she off to?" Anya asked.  
"She has to take a cold shower" Willow said, a smile appearing on her face.  
"And I'm asking why?" Xander verbalized.  
"Think about it, Xander" Willow said repressing a giggle.   
"Way too much information, Wills" Xander said grimacing. "Wait I'm having a thought. Its becuase of Spike, right?" Xander asked suddenly.  
"Well, yeah Xander" Willow said, exasperated.  
"They're going patroling together!" Xander articulated.  
"So?"   
"So, what do you think they're going to do?!?" Xander cried.  
"Xander, I don't think they will do anything that isn't meant to be"  
"Yeah, well, they just might do each other, and I'm not okay with that"  
"I don't even know if Buffy will even sum up enough courage tonight to tell him she likes him like that"  
"Good"  
"Xander..." Willow groaned.  
  
*****  
  
Buffy trailed her eyes around her front yard anxiously. Willow had advised her to tell Spike the truth; that she wanted him in a major way. And she had recommended her to do it that night. Buffy was very, very nervous. She was pacing frantically. *Okay, calm down, you don't want Spike to see you like this do you?* she scolded herself. She finally sat on the front step to keep herself from repeating the frenzied gesture of her worry.   
A million thoughts ran through her mind as she sat, wringing her hands together wildly. *What if he laughs at me? What if he leaves for good? What if he tells me that we're nothing more than friends, if that?*   
Her mind stopped going into overdrive when she saw Spike walking up the driveway. It was a good thing that she had stopped twisting her hands around in her lap. He would defiently know something was up then. Her thoughts slowly started changing completely. By the time he had came to a stop in front of her, she felt absolutely calm. It was a good thing he wasn't standing too close to her.  
Spike looked at the beauty sitting on the steps in front of him. She looked a lot calmer than she had earlier that day when she had came into his crypt asking him to patrol with her. He supposed she was probably tense about something earlier. His thoughts didn't rest on that subject too long. Especially since she was looking absolutely adorable dressed in blue jeans, a white spegetti strap tank top with a zip up pink sweater over it, looking up at him with her bright eyes.   
He watched as she grabbed her slaying bag and stood in front of him. Now that she was closer, the calm he had been experiencing was fading away. He absently offered to carry her bag. She handed it to him with a 'thanks'. He nodded, unable to speak. He had almost forgotten how intense his attraction to her was.   
Buffy was surprised at how fast her composure had diminished. The second she had stood up she instinatly wanted him with need that she couldn't describe. When he had taken her bag from her, their hands had brushed, driving her wild. She scolded herself silently as she followed Spike down the driveway.  
  
******  
  
It had been an hour and a half and they had slain about 7 nasties, but Buffy still hadn't talked to him about how she felt about him. *Maybe patrol's not the best place for meaninful talks* she decided. *I'll talk to him after we finish*   
She kept her distance from him and he kept his. She was thankful for that, because when ever he started getting close to her, she lost all common sense. She just hoped it would stay that way, unless it included him kissing her, or taking off her clothing. *I wouldn't mind that... not at all* She unconsiously slipped into thoughts about what he would look like naked, and it was turning her on. Spike's voice yanked her from her fantasies.  
"Slayer, You think maybe we should call it a night?"   
She sighed. It looked like the time was nearing for her to fess up. "Yeah, I think we've done enough for tonight."  
"Alright."  
"Do you want me to walk you home?"  
"Sure, luv"   
Without a word, they both headed the direction of his crypt.  
  
*****  
  
"Home, sweet home" Spike said jokenly as they aproached the crypt. Buffy forced a small smile. She had been trying to figure out a way to tell him how she felt. She still was clueless to what she was going to say and she didn't have much time. If she was going to tell him that night, it would have to be then.  
"'Night, Slayer" He still wouldn't try to let her name slip out of his mouth. "See you tommarow night?"  
"Yeah" She replied, not thinking. He turned to enter his crypt.  
She shook herself mentally. "Spike?" She blurted.  
"Yeah?" He turned to face her. He gazed at her intently. She couldn't do this.  
"Don't be late"  
He chuckled. "I won't, luv"  
"Bye Spike"  
"Bye Slayer"  
  
*****  
  
When Buffy arrived home Willow was sitting on the couch with Dawn, watching a movie. Buffy knew exactly why Willow was there; she wanted to know how things went with Spike. Buffy sighed, what was she going to tell her?  
Willow got up from the couch when she heard the front door close. She walked over to her best friend. Dawn watched them with interest, eavsdropping. "Hey Buffy, I didn't think you'd get home so early" Willow gave her a knowing smile. "So, come on, sit down and tell me and Dawn what happened."  
"You told her?!?"  
"No, but she's your sister, shouldn't she know?"   
"I guess." Buffy went and sat on the couch next to Dawn.  
Willow sat on the floor in front of them. "So tell... what happened?" she asked eagerly.  
"I didn't tell him"  
"Buffy!"  
"I know, I just froze, I guess."  
"When are you going to talk to him?" Willow prodded.  
"I don't know" Buffy said miserably. "It's just, everytime I'm around him, I can't think straight. I know, its crazy. Also, I'm afraid of what he'll say"  
"Its ok, Buffy. You'll know when its the right time to tell him."  
"I guess"  
Dawn had been patinatly listening for long enough, she wanted to know who her sister was having the hots for. "Whats he like Buffy?" She asked excitly.  
Buffy was thankful for the chance to talk about him. "He's incredable" she said dreamily. "He's so sweet, funny, and just.. wow"  
"He sounds great" Dawn gushed. "Is he cute?"  
"Major hottie"   
"Who is he?" Dawn asked with wonder. Who could be so perfect? She thought breifly of Spike.. he was totally crushing on Buffy, she felt bad for him. *Looks like he'll have to watch Buffy go through another boyfriend*  
"Well.." Buffy said, hesitant to tell her.  
"Do I know him?"  
"Yes"  
"C'mon, Buffy, tell me!"  
"Its Spike" Buffy said queitly, looking at her lap.  
"Get out!" Dawn said, way surprised. Now that she thought about it, he did match her description. *Should I tell her he's ,without a doubt, crazy about her?* Buffy looked up at her, blushing slightly. *I'll let her find that out for herself*  
"You think I'm crazy don't you?" Buffy asked her.  
"Oh please, he SO fine! You'd only be crazy if you didn't think so!" Dawn proclaimed.  
Buffy giggled.   
"Oh yeah, Buffy, there's this thing at the Bronze, you see, they're gonna let the eigth graders in tomarrow night, and Mom said that if you take me, I can go." There was a questioning tone to her voice.  
"Oh, alright. Even though I have to do this thing tomarow night called patrol, and, you see, it saves innocent people from getting sucked dry by these big old meanie vamps" Buffy said jokenly. "And if I don't patrol, I don't get to see my hottie-peroxide-blonde-vampire tomorrow."  
"Oooh, Buffy. I could stop by his crypt tomorrow while you train. I'll tell him that we're all going to the Bronze, and patrolling's cancelled. And that he can come if he wants." Willow suggested.  
"You'd do that?"  
"Yup"  
"Thanks Will!" She reached down and squeezed her best friend in a quick hug.  
"No prob."  
Dawn sat back agianst the couch, smiling. Within 24 hours she was going to play matchmaker to a Slayer and a vampire.  
  
End  
  
Stories in series ~  
  
[I Want You To Need Me] [My All] [Fall For You] 


	3. Fall For You

TITLE: Fall For You  
SUMMARY: Dawn goes through with her plan. It doesn't exactly work out the way she hoped.  
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Buffy The Vampire Slayer or any of its characters. I only own the storyline.  
RATING: G maybe PG   
SPOILAGE: All events up until "Blood Ties" applies. The first two stories from the series also apply. You might want to read them first (links at bottom of the page).   
AUTHORS NOTE: Buffy/Spike. Lyrics from Shanice's cd  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Willow lightly rapped on the door to the dank crypt that Spike lived in. She really hoped that Spike wouldn't turn down his invation to the Bronze. Dawn had told her that she was going to try to get them together. She had aslo told Willow that Spike liked Buffy. That made their job much easier. They just had to get them to fess up.  
Spike opened the door, standing where he couldn't get burnt by the sun's rays. "Hey, Red. Come on in."   
She stepped inside and stood there, looking around his home.   
"What brings you here?" He questioned.  
"Buffy wanted me to tell you that patrolling's cancelled tonight. We're taking Dawn Bronzin'"  
"Not that I'm not glad to see you and all, but why didn't she come and tell me herself?" He was disapointed that he wouldn't get to see Buffy that night, and that she hadn't come to tell him herself.  
"She's training"  
"Oh"  
"But she also wanted to know if you maybe wanted to meet us there"  
"Oh, sure, that'd be fine" Spike's features lit up. Buffy wanted him to come with.  
"Meet us there around 7:30" Willow told him, smiling inwardly at the pleased experssion on his face.  
"See you there, Red"  
"Bye Spike"  
  
******  
  
Buffy stopped pummeling the dummy that Xander had made for her the second she saw Willow.  
"Will! Your back! What did he say? Is he coming?"  
"You know what, I think he's starting become nicer and more gentlemanish. He told me he was glad to see me."  
"Yeah, I know. What did he say?"  
"But I just can't believe he sits around in that crypt all the time. Its got to get boring" Willow rambled, purposly not telling Buffy what she wanted to know.  
"Willow.." Buffy whined. "C'mon, the suspense is killing me."  
"Oh all right. He said that.." Willow trailed off for effect.  
"What? What did he say?!?" Buffy was getting very impatiant.  
"He'll come tonight" Willow finished a huge grin on her face.  
"Really?!? Oh my God.. what the hell am I going to wear?" Buffy looked very stressed over the issue.  
"Don't worry, I'll help you get ready."  
"Thanks a lot, Will. What would I do without you?"  
  
******  
  
Dawn jumped up exiitedly from her position on the end of Buffy's bed. "That's it! It's perfect!"  
Buffy carefully eyed herself in the full length mirror on her door. She looked over to Willow, waiting for the confirmation of the outfit that she was wearing. Willow had a huge grin on her face.   
"I think we have a winner" Willow confirmed. "Oh, Buffy you look fantastic!" Willow gushed.  
"Are we absolutly positive?" She said turning sideways to admire how the outfit hugged her curves. Her answer was two enthusiastic nods.  
"Alright, then, we have one hour to figure out what to do with my makeup and hair." She looked down to her bare feet. "And shoes" She added looking back up to the mirror.  
"I think you should keep your hair down, but, like, make it really, really, soft and shiny, you know, so he can run his fingers through it while you dance... or kiss..." Dawn suggested, trailing off at the air, looking off into space thinking about how romantic it sounded.  
"Dawn! You're making me nervous! Who said anything about me getting close to him in any kind of way?" Buffy said, not knowing they were trying to get her primped for a romantic evening. Her palms started getting sweaty and her heart pounded in her chest at the thought of kissing him.  
"What ARE you planning on doing? Discussing politics? C'mon Buffy!" Dawn said, not believing her sister.  
"No.. its just bad things happen when I get near him... very bad things..." She said, nervousness showing in her voice. Willow gave her friend a qiuck squeeze.  
"Its going to be fine. Remember, carpe diem?"  
"Right... sieze the day"  
"Unless of course you're not in a seizy mood today?"  
"I'm really not.. really, really, not."  
"Uh-oh"  
  
*******  
  
The music was pounding and people were dancing.. save for two lonesome figures at a table. Dawn and Spike.   
Dawn saw this as the perfect oppurtunity to get something going between her sister and the blonde vampire. "So, uh, Spike, I noticed that you seem to like Buffy" Dawn spilled out quickly.  
Spike suddenley looked like a deer caught in headlights as he straightened, looking throughly uncomfortable.   
"I don't know what you're talking about."  
"Oh, come on. You don't really think its not totally obvious do you?" Dawn said rolling her eyes at his childish way he was acting.   
"Is it really?" he said slumping over, like a puppy that knows its been caught doing something wrong.  
"Yep" Dawn flashed him her cute little girl smile. She widened her smile when Spike's shoulder's sagged, which in turn made Spike slump further into his seat. "Now you can go ask her dance"  
She held back a laugh when his eyes widened, enabling her to see the panic even clearer.   
"No.. I can't.." he said fumbling his words.  
"C'mon, its not like you guys are enemies now. She wants to be your friend. Friends dance. And friends who want more show it while dancing. In other words.. you." She said taking a quick breath after her fast lecture. "Now go"  
"But.." He protested.  
"Spike, this is your chance! Don't you want to find a way to let her know how you feel without having to tell her?"  
"There is no way I can show her how much I love her out there on that dance floor" He said, daring a glance over at the Slayer, swaying her hips to the beat of the music.  
Dawn grabbed his arm. She only knew about the part where they were attracted to each other. Love had not been involved then.  
"You're in love with Buffy?"  
"Yeah" Spike said, looking shyly down at his lap.  
Dawn was even more determined than ever to make this work.   
"All the more reason you should ask her to dance."  
"How am I going to make her know that its more than friendly?"  
"I'm sure you can think of something." Dawn said putting her elbows up on the table to rest her chin on her folded hands, looking at him slyly, making sure that he didn't misunderstand. She was sure he would have blushed if he was able to.  
"Oh all right. But I'm going to do anything too..."  
"Spike" Dawn cut him off. "Just dance with her, okay?"   
"Not a problem.. not at all..." She heard him say as he walked away. She smiled again and leaned back in her chair, ready to watch the show. She had no idea what to expect. She hadn't really seen Buffy and Spike while they were together before. She knew it would be intresting though.  
  
  
*****  
  
Spike was uncontrolably nervous as he walked towards the Slayer's gyrating form. He reached her as the song neared its ending. She saw him standing there and stopped her dancing.  
"Spike, is something wrong?" She asked worried.   
He stepped closer, and her body reacted to his nearness.  
"No, I just wanted to ask you if you'd like to dance with me." He watched as Buffy's concerned face immediently fell away.   
Buffy paused a moment after her concern slipped away. She had to make a decision. If she danced with him again, there was no going back. She would have to tell him how she felt or she would go crazy. On the other hand that would drive her crazy no matter what. But, she knew if they danced, she wouldn't be able to keep it friendly. The last time that they had danced, it had sparked the mild attraction she had felt before then and turned it into a unstopable flame.  
She looked up into his eyes, searching for an answer. She found it. He looked confused, nervous, and scared, just like she felt. She knew that she had to have this vampire. She flashed him a smile.  
"I'd love to"  
Spike relaxed a bit at her words. He took her small hand in his larger one and pulled her closer to him just as a slow song began to play.  
  
"There's a right or wrong to know for everything  
And the truth is writen somewhere inbetween  
But there's always something missing in the dark  
There you will find the true condition of the heart"  
  
Spike recalled his conversation with Dawn and bravely pulled Buffy flush agianst him. He heard her gasp slightly. He felt her tense, and pulled away from her a little. She looked up into his eyes. He smiled softly at her, not holding back his emotions. He felt her relax into his arms, wrapping her own arms around him bringing him closer yet agian. She smiled up at him. He responded by tucking a stray golden strand behind her ear. She then leaned into him, resting her cheek on his shoulder, eyes closed, and sighed in contentment.  
  
"Well I can visualize the peices of a dream  
And its not as far away as it may seem  
But if truth be told its you that holds the key  
To the question that defines our destiny"  
  
Dawn had been sitting on the edge of her seat as soon as Spike had aproached her sister, entraptered. She had watched them talk for a minute, not being able to comprehend a word they were saying. She had watched them exchange affecionate touches and smiles before Buffy had closed the small gap between them and had laid her head on his shoulder. She hadn't moved at all during the entire thing so far. All she could do was sit there with a big smile on her face and watch them barely sway to the music, being more caught up in holding each other.  
  
"I've had plenty conversations with my heart  
Cause I want this thing to work, not fall apart  
Oh, I ask my heart how it can be so sure  
And it answers me becuase your heart is pure"  
  
There was no mistaking it this time, Buffy knew that neither of them intented this dance to be a 'just-friends-dance'. She felt absolutly content. She felt dizzingly excited about being in his arms agian, yet completly realxed at the same time. She knew now that there defently was no going back when she looked into his ice blue eyes she saw her own desire and need reflected back at her. Last time they danced, the music had flooded through her, setting the mood. This time, she barely regeristered it. It was just her and him together for that momenet.   
  
"I have every expectation that its true  
Cause my heart won't lie to me, much less to you  
But if truth be told its you that holds the key  
To the future that becomes our destiny"  
  
Willow, Tara, Xander, and Anya stopped dancing mid-song to go sit at their table, which had a better view of the blonde couple on the dance floor. They sat with Dawn, soon becoming as caught up in the scene before them as her. Willow nudged Dawn and smiled and winked at her.   
"We did it"  
"No, they did" Dawn replied before turning back to watch her sister in the arms of a vampire who loved her.   
  
"To the mountion snow that melts in the stream  
My heart flows like the river to the sea  
To the heavens up above  
I pray to God our destiny is love"  
  
"I've been in love a time or two  
I've seen the world but not with you  
I wanna fly and spread my wings  
I don't wanna cry, I wanna sing  
I wanna live and take a chance  
I'm not afraid to love agian  
I wanna fall, fall for you  
And I want you to fall for me too"  
  
As the song ended, they pulled apart slightly, not ready to let go all the way yet. Spike decided that it was time she knew. He leaned closer to her until his lips were by her ear. She put a hand on his upper arm, not knowing what to expect.   
"Buffy, I love you" He depleted into her ear, puncuating his statement with a light kiss on her cheek.  
Buffy froze. He loved her? She knew he wanted her, but she never knew love was a part of the deal. Did she love him? She knew she craved him, but she truly couldn't verify whether she loved him or not. She felt the light kiss. A part of her wanted to just grab him and let him kiss her throughly, but the other part told her she couldn't do the one-way love thing agian. She had already gone through that with Riley. She fought with her desires and pulled away from him. She looked up at him. It was too much. She saw the love for her shining through his eyes.  
"I-i can't do this" she managed before extracting herself from his embrace and hurrying out of the Bronze.  
  
*****  
  
Dawn jumped up from her seat. What had happened? Buffy had just yanked away from Spike and rushed out of the club.   
"Dawn, what's going on?" Willow asked.  
"I don't know" Dawn said, her brows furrowing, lost in thought. She was going to have to have a talk to Spike.  
  
*******  
  
Dawn pounded loudly on the wooden door to the crypt where Spike had made his home.  
"Spike, I know you're in there. Open up this instant!" She shouted to him through the locked door. She pushed at it slightly. It wasn't that sturdy.   
"I'll break down this door if I have to mister!" Dawn was furious. Spike had obviously done something to upset Buffy. She had tried to talk to her but she had ignored her. She wasn't going to let Spike get away too.  
"Spike, open the damn door!" she screamed violently. Suddenly the door swung open and she stepped inside, shutting it behind her.  
"Such language for a girl your age" Spike teased at her half-heartedly when she entered.  
"Its about time you open that stinking door" She stated matter-of-factly. She gave him a tough-guy look.  
"I was this.." She held up her fingers so he could see that her forefinger and thunb were almost touching, "..close to kicking down that flismy old door."  
"Alright, alright I get the point. Aren't you supposed to be going home after school?" He asked her, making it obvious to her that he was trying to avoid the subject she had come there to discuss.  
"Hello, its way past school time. I told Buffy I was going out, and she didn't say anything. Now that is majoraly weird. Usually she's all 'you're the key thingymababer, you can't go anywhere 'cuz this Glory chick might get you, take you to some lock, shove you in and give you a good twist.' And okay she's right, I should be careful. Which is why I brought these." She unzipped her backpack to show him the stakes, crosses, and holy water. "But, anyway, the point is, usually she's so overprotective. You did something to her, Spike. She is acting totally weird." Dawn stared at him, hard, for a few seconds. "What did you do?"  
"I didn't do anything, that's the problem." Spike replied, knowing he was going to have to be honest with her.  
"Then whats wrong with her?" Dawn asked, faltering, scared that something was going wrong with her sister.  
"We danced, then... then I told her I loved her. And she ran off" Spike explained, looking off, thinking hard about what he had just said.  
"Well, that probably has something to do with it." Dawn catiously. "Maybe we should ask the others."  
"No, don't get them involved. They won't aprove of how I feel about her." Spike said panicking. He didn't need the others agianst him as well as Buffy.  
"Spike, they know whats going on. C'mon, its, like, so obvious." Dawn reasured him.  
"And besides, they probably know whats wrong with her." She stopped, thinking about what she had said. "Or at least they will when we tell them what happened."  
"Alright, then, what are we waiting for?"   
  
******  
  
"Hey Spike!" Willow said cheerfully when she noticed the blonde vampire had entered the magic shop.  
"Hey Willow" Spike replied, not so happily back.  
Willow took a moment to take in his apperance. He looked ragged, like he hadn't slept at all since she had last seen him.  
"Is everything okay?" She asked, worried. She had seen what had happened the previous night at the Bronze.  
"Actually, we were wondering if you guys could help us figure out whats wrong with Buffy." Dawn announced. "See, last night Spike told Buffy that he's in love with her. That's when we saw her freak and clear out."   
"Yeah, no one's seen her since then." Tara added.  
"You're in love with Buffy?" Xander asked Spike, looking him up and down.  
"Yes, but thats really not the issue. I want to know why she ran off like that. I mean, things were going just fine before I told her." Spike replied, frustrated.  
"I think I know why" Xander said, realization hitting him. "Its 'cuz of Riley."  
"What about Riley? He's long gone! And if she was still stuck on him, why'd she dance with me? Twice?" Spike demanded.  
"No, that's not what I meant. She's afraid to get stuck in the same kind of situation. Riley loved her, she couldn't love him back. Look where that got them. Everybody saw him departing long before it happened. We were all just waiting for it to happen someday. She doesn't want to go through that agian." Xander explained, pacing throughout his reasoning.  
"Oh" Was all Spike could say. *I'm an idiot to think I could have her.*  
"In other words she doesn't know if she loves him or if she can, and cares for him too much to put him through that?" Dawn said insightfully.  
"Sounds like it" Willow confirmed.  
"So she's doing this because she doesn't want to hurt me? I'm hurting right now. She didn't prevent anything! If only she knew how much I love her.." Spike tyrated. He stopped pacing and looked at everybody's symaptheic faces. He sat down in a chair, head down. "I'm a fool. I was a fool to think for one second that I could be with her."  
"Spike, its not like that. We watched you guys. She likes you, she wants you. Its killing her too probably. In the long run, she's right. It'll only hurt both of you more than you are right now if you guys are together when she doesn't feel the same." Willow soothed.  
"I guess" Spike stood with a loud sigh. "What do I do now?"  
"Go home. Get some sleep. Give her some time." Dawn ordered, mortherly-like. "Maybe she'll change her mind with time. Don't get your hopes too high though. After a while, maybe you guys can try the -being-friends-thing."  
"Well, its better than nothing." Spike said, collecting his coat. The entire room watched him leave.  
Dawn sighed. There was nothing else she could do. They were on their own now.  
  
~ END  
  
Stories in series ~  
[I Want You To Need Me][My All][Fall For You] 


	4. I Wanna Love You Forever

TITLE: I Wanna Love You Forever  
BY: Buffy3304@aol.com  
SUMMARY: Buffy makes a discovery. She now has to come to terms with what she wants.  
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Buffy The Vampire Slayer or any of its characters. I only own the storyline.  
RATING: PG   
SPOILAGE: All events up until "Blood Ties" applies. The first three stories from the series also apply. You might want to read them first (links at bottom of the page).   
AUTHORS NOTE: Buffy/Spike. Lyrics from Jessica Simpson's Sweet Kisses cd  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Buffy went straight into her room when she entered her house. It was only 9:00, but she was physically and emotionally exhausted. She sighed as she closed the door. She walked over to her very comfy looking bed. She reluctantly looked over to her dresser, thinking that she shuld probably change into some pajamas. She slowly dragged herself over to the dresser, opening the top right one to pull out a long t-shirt.   
Half-asleep, she changed drugerly into the much, much more comfortable outfit. If she didn't have the great need to be comfortable that night, she would have went to bed in her tight black pants and shimmery- red-barly-there halter.   
She eagerly, went over to her bed, turning down the neatly made covers. She crawled under the covers, curling up in a semi-ball around a pillow. She closed her eyes, waiting for sleep to take her.   
After several minutes she opened her eyes. She was comfortable, she was tired, she needed relaxation, yet, she couldn't drift off. Lying there with nothing else to occupy her mind, she did the only thing that she could do. She cried. She cried with harsh sobs, her tears smearing the mascara she haddened bothered to wash off before she tucked herself away in bed. Her pillow rapidly became covered with splotches of the makeup. She didn't care. She only hugged the pillow tighter, wishing the pain would go away.   
  
*******  
  
"Buffy?" Dawn called softly as she entered Buffy's room. She saw Buffy curled up on the bed, hugging a pillow.   
"Yeah?" Buffy answered hoarsly back just as Dawn was turning to leave.  
Dawn went over to the bed and sat down.   
"Are you okay?" She asked her older sister with concern.  
"No," Buffy answered dully.  
"Do you want to talk about it?"  
With a sigh, Buffy sat up to face her sister.  
"Oh, god Buffy," Dawn said, seeing her mascarra streaked face. "Whats going on?"  
"Spike... he.... he told me that he loves me."  
"And that's a bad thing?" Dawn asked gently.  
"I don't know. Is it? I mean, I know from experence with Riley that love is not a one-way thing."  
"So, you don't feel the same way?" Dawn prodded.  
"I don't know," Buffy responded sadly, as tears welled in her eyes. "I know I have feelings for him. But are they really that deep?"  
"Well, you're the only one who can figure that out, Buffy," Dawn told her, wistfully.  
"How am I supposed to know?"   
"Try not to think how you feel about him. Just for now. Think about how he makes you feel."   
"Special. Like I'm the only one in the world he wants. He makes me just want to forget all the complications and let go, just let him hold me. Its like if I could do that, everything would be okay. Whenever I'm around him, its like evrything else just fades away, its just us."  
"Wow" Dawn said in awe.   
"I know. I've never felt like this with anyone...." Buffy trailed off, slowly realizing what she said. "Oh God."  
"Buffy?" Dawn asked tenitavily.  
"Dawn, I love him more than anything and I completly blew it!" Buffy stood up from the bed and started pacing.  
"Buffy, calm down. Its not too late."  
"Its not?" Buffy asked doubtfully, stopping her pacing to look at Dawn.  
"Spike is completly, totally, head over heels in love with you. He's sitting there waiting for the day you show up and tell him you feel the same."  
"Then I'll go tell him! Right now. He has to know." Buffy said frantically.  
"Buffy, you need to get some sleep, think about what you're going to say to him. Freshen up. You can see him tommarrow."  
"You're right. I am exaughsted. And I'm not exactly looking my greatest either." She sat on the bed agian. "I'll go see him tomarrow."  
  
*****  
  
Buffy took a very much needed breath before knocking on the worn out crypt door. Nervous did not even begin to describe how she felt. Today was the day that she finally had to be honest with Spike, as well as herself.   
The door opened, slightly. Buffy took that as a 'come on in' signal. So she did just that.  
She shut the door and turned to face the blonde vampire.  
The very haggard looking blonde vampire.  
She gasped slightly as she took in his appearence.  
"Buffy?" Spike whispered, as if he couldn't believe she was really there.  
"Yeah" She replied, guilt flashing through her as she watched as his emotions play on his face, going from utter heartbreak to surprise to hopefulness.  
"You're here" He managed, a questioning tone in his voice.  
"Alot has happened this past week," Buffy started. "But there's been a major lack of communication between us. That has gotten every thing very messed up. I think we should clear every thing up, right now."  
"What is there really to say?" Spike asked her, hurt in his voice, "I think things are pretty clear."  
"No, I don't things are. Last night at the Bronze, I ran out bec-" Buffy began to explain.  
"Because you were afraid. When you were with Riley, he loved you, but you couldn't love him back. That's why he left. You don't want to be in that situation agian." Spike finished for her.  
"Okay, I guess that much is clear. I wasn't exactly going to say all that, but you're right. I was so scared that I was going to hurt you like I hurt Riley. And, no, I don't want to go through that agian. I'm not going to do that to anyone, not ever agian."   
"So, bascilly, this is a nice way of saying that I have no chance in hell with you?" Spike asked all of the sadness and heartbreak returning to his features.   
"Spike, I told you, we have to get things straight, then we'll talk about us."   
"That's what this is all about, isn't it? I don't need you to sugarcoat every thing for me. I want the truth. I want to know how you feel about me. I want to know how things are going to be. Am I going to leave town? Or are we going to try to be friends?" Spike half asked half demanded her.  
" You want the truth? No toning down? Are you sure you're ready for that?" Buffy asked, stepping closer, her barely controled emotions coming through.  
"I'm sure. Don't hold back with me. We've done enough guessing games. I want straight out, brutual, no emotions held back honesty." Spike answered, steeling himself for the rejection he was sure she was going him.  
"Alright, I owe you that." She took a deep breath. "I talked to Dawn last night. In the process of confusing you, I managed to confuse myself. I realized some stuff. I want to be with you, no matter what. We have something here, something good. We can't just throw that away."   
"What about every thing with Riley?" Spike cut in, catiously.  
"This is completly diffrent. I got into the relationship thinking that I could learn to love him. You can't learn to, you just fall." Buffy explained, letting everything in her heart seep through into her words.  
"Are you saying you think you could love me someday? That would work wouldn't it?" Spike asked her, hoping agianst hope.  
"Yeah, I guess it would. But that's not what I'm saying." Spike's face fell. "I don't *think* that someday I'll just fall. I know that right now, I'm completly, totally in love with you. I think I fell a long time ago. I don't know when things changed, but I do know that I need you with me. When I'm with you, nothing else matters." Buffy finished, tears streaming down her face.  
"Buffy.." Spike said, his voice rough with emotion.  
"O God.. I'm so scared. I love you so much it scares me." Buffy admitted, crying, backing up slightly.  
"I'm scared too." Spike whispered, his own tears falling. "If you leave now, just go, we can pretend this never happened. I want to be with you, but only if thats what you truly want." He added, not wanting her to feel forced into this.  
"It is" Buffy choked out, walking back up to him. "I'm scared to let myself love you, but I'm more scared to be without you." Buffy slowly wrapped her arms around him, and buried her face in his neck, sobbing quietly.  
"Buffy, I love you so much" Spike told her, pulling her closer agianst him.  
  
******  
  
After they had cryed out the frustrations of everything that had happened, the blond couple broke apart.   
"I should probably go. You know, try to get some sleep tonight. Haven't had much of that lately." Buffy told him, sounding clearly reluctant to leave.  
Spike could sense her unwillingness to go.   
"You don't have to leave." He told her, slightly hopeful.  
"You mean stay here tonight?" Buffy asked, a slight tremble going through her body as she imagined the possibilities.  
"Just to sleep. You wouldn't have to go all the way home.. and.." Spike trailed off, not being able to think up an excuse.  
"You know that isn't the reason why you want me to stay," Buffy pointed out, stepping a little closer, looking up at him.  
"I-i want to hold you tonight" Spike admitted softly, looking at the ground. Buffy's breathe caught in her throat at how sweet it was. "But its up to you" He added quickly.  
"I want to stay. And not just becuase of the walk home."   
"Oh. Well, I have some clothes you can borrow. They'll probably be more comfortable than..." Spike trailed off as he realized that Buffy was staring at him. "What?"  
Knowing she had been caught, Buffy just gave in. She closed the small gap between them and pressed her lips to his. "That's what." She whispered as she pulled slightly away from him.  
Spike took a deep breathe, knowing that if he started kissing her agian that he wouldn't be able to stop himself.  
"We should go to bed."  
  
*******  
  
  
*more coming soon* 


End file.
